From Hopeless to Held: Finding Hope When the Holidays Feel Heavy

(Advent Week 2: Hope)

Do you ever look around during December and think…
“Wait… did I miss the memo where everyone else signed up for the Perfect Holiday Life Package?”

Because based on the commercials, Instagram feeds, and painfully cheerful car ads, it seems like the whole world is gathering around a glowing table full of gourmet food, matching pajamas, twinkle lights, and, of course, zero family dysfunction.

Meanwhile, you might be over here eating cereal for dinner, wondering where your people are, or praying that one relationship, just one, could feel stable for once.

If so, deep breath.
You’re in the right place.
And no, nothing is wrong with you.

This week, we’re talking about HOPE, the quiet, steady, unexpected kind that Jesus brings right into the messy, muddy, imperfect life you’re actually living.

Because last week, we talked about choosing joy even when your face feels like it forgot how to smile.
But joy has a sister.
And her name is HOPE.

Let’s go there. Finding hope.

When the Holidays Don’t Look Like the Commercials

Here’s the truth:
December can be the loneliest month of the year, not because something is wrong with you, but because marketing teams are very good at showing us a picture of togetherness that doesn’t always match our reality.

Not everyone has a warm, gathering-around-the-table family.
Not everyone has a group of friends planning cookie swaps and pajama parties.
Not everyone feels connected, valued, or seen.

Some of us walk into December holding loss.
Some of us are carrying strained relationships.
Some of us are rebuilding our self-worth from pieces we didn’t expect to be picking up right now.

And some, maybe you, are trying very hard not to cry during a Target run because “Silent Night” started playing at the worst possible moment. (Been there. 0/10, do not recommend.)

But here’s the holy rebellion of Advent:

Hope isn’t a luxury for people whose lives look like Christmas movies.
Hope is a lifeline for those of us who know life is messy, and still dare to believe that God hasn’t forgotten us.

A Personal Story: When Hope Walked in the Door

There was one Christmas, one I will never forget, when everything in my life felt like it had collapsed.

I had reached the breaking point with my alcoholic husband.
He wasn’t getting better.
He was getting worse, unreliable, paranoid, unstable, and my toddler son deserved safety, joy, and peace more than I deserved to pretend everything was fine.

So I left.
And that December, I sat in the quiet of my home, numb, frightened, and fighting the crushing lie of failure.

How could I have loved someone so deeply… and still end up here?
How could he choose addiction over us?
How could my life feel this hollow?

It was the loneliest Christmas I had ever lived.
But somewhere between the tears on the carpet and the Fisher-Price toys scattered around the living room, something shifted.

Not instantly.
Not magically.
But gently like the soft glow of a candle in a dark room.

Hope.

It came not through circumstance, not through reconciliation, not through a Hallmark-movie miracle…
but through the steady, healing presence of Jesus.

Hope reminded me:
I wasn’t abandoned.
I wasn’t unlovable.
I wasn’t destined to stay broken.

And as I poured my attention into making Christmas magical for my 18-month-old boy, I realized something:

Hope doesn’t always roar.
Sometimes it whispers.
Sometimes it wraps around your shoulders when no one else is there.
Sometimes it shows up as the strength to get out of bed and choose joy, just like we talked about last week.

If hope found me in that dark December, it can find you too.

Why HOPE Matters in Your Hard Season

Hope isn’t pretending everything is fine.
Hope is believing that with Jesus, everything won’t stay the way it is.

Here’s what Advent hope says:

• You don’t have to stay stuck in sadness—Jesus sits with you in it.
  
• Your story isn’t over—God specializes in new beginnings.
  
• Your loneliness doesn’t define you—Jesus Himself calls you friend.
  
• Your heart can heal—because the One who made it holds it.
  

Hope is knowing that God sees what you’re carrying…
and He’s already working behind the scenes, preparing a way forward.

And yes, maybe life feels muddy right now.
Maybe your relationships don’t look like the holiday greeting cards.
Maybe your heart is bruised in places no one can see.

But if Jesus came for anything, He came for you—for the hopeless, the hurting, the healing, the rebuilding, the wondering, the waiting.

Hope is yours.
Right now.
Right here.

How to Bring HOPE Back Into Your December

Here are a few gentle, grace-filled steps to help shift your heart from heaviness to hopefulness:

1. Separate fact from fiction

Commercials, magazine covers, and curated Instagram photos are fictional holiday storytelling.
Real life is beautifully, maddeningly imperfect.

Don’t compare your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel.
Jesus came for real people with real struggles, not for the families in matching sweaters who somehow look like they enjoy assembling gingerbread houses.

2. Pray honestly about what you want your life to look like

Ask God:

• What am I longing for?
  
• Why does this season hurt so much?
  
• What are You trying to show me?
  

He’s not afraid of your feelings.  He stepped into the messiest stable imaginable just to prove it.

3. Love yourself with the same love Jesus gives you

Self-compassion isn’t weakness; it’s spiritual strength.
You deserve gentleness.
You deserve a warm blanket of grace.
You deserve to treat your heart like it is worth protecting because it is.

4. Let small joys crack open the door to hope

A good cup of coffee.
A walk with uplifting music.
A clean-jokes page that makes you snort-laugh.
A note to yourself on a sticky note: “Jesus came for me. Hope lives here.”

Sometimes hope starts with tiny sparks.

5. Remember: hope isn’t something you create, it’s Someone you cling to

Jesus is hope.
And He came for you.

A Little Smile for the Road…

You know how last week we talked about smiling more? From Serious to Smiling: How to Embrace Laughter, Grace, and a Little Holiday Joy
Well… consider this your reminder that even Jesus had a sense of humor.

I mean, He hung out with Peter (and even chose him as a disciple) who was a man who could start an argument in an empty room.
If Jesus loved him, He can definitely handle you and your holiday emotions.

A Prayer for You This Week

**Jesus,

For the one reading this who feels forgotten, alone, overwhelmed, or quietly breaking, remind us that Your hope is stronger than our sadness.

Bring light into our dark corners and warmth into the cold places in our heart.

Help us see ourselves the way You see us: loved, held, chosen, and never abandoned.

Restore our hope, even if only in small, steady ways at first.

Thank You for coming close, right into the mess of our lives, so we never have to walk alone.

Amen.**

A Closing Encouragement

Friend, you don’t have to “feel” hopeful for hope to be real.
Hope is a gift from God, one He never stops offering.And if someone you know needs this message, share it with them.
Like, comment, and let’s lift each other up this week.
You + Jesus + HOPE?
Unstoppable.

Here are some of my favorite songs to bring bright light to your eyes:
Grown Up Christmas List

Jesus Was Born Today

Go Tell It On the Mountain

Christmas in Sarajevo

The Manger

Because of Bethlehem

A Christmas Story: Paul Harvey